They never sought mair o' the spinning Their very first wark was to sew the fig o't.
A pair of grey hoggers 5 well clinked benew,
Of nae ither litt but the hue of the ewe,
Wi' a pair of rough rullions? to scuff thro'
the dew,
Was the fee they sought at the beginn-
ing o't.
An' syne gaed to try the spinning o't. When Adam he delvèd, and mother Eve span,
There was naething like pride and like gentry than;
But now there's eneugh baith in woman an' man,
Which could not be but5 the spinning o't.
With spinning I hae a far happier life,
Than Mary, the Queen, I'll warrant you o't;
For she seldom lived free o' trouble or strife,
For drinking, and dancing, and brulyies,'
And boxing and shaking of fa's,
The town was for ever in tulyies; 2
But now the lassie 's awa'.
For she kent nae the art o' the spinning But had they but ken'd her as I did,
Their errand it wad hae been sma' ;
She neither kent spinning nor carding,
Nor brewing nor baking ava'.
But wooers ran all mad upon her,
Because she was bonny and braw,
And sae I dread will be seen on her,
When she's by hand, and awa'.
He'll roose3 her but sma' that has married
her,
Now when he's gotten her a',
And wish, I fear, he had miscarry'd her,
Tocher and ribbons and a'.
For her art it lay all in her dressing ;
But gin her braws ance were awa',
I fear she'll turn out of the fashion,
And knit up her moggans 4 with straw.
But in what part where I can be,
My wavering brains yet torture me.
Once I was called a great Fife Laird
I dwelt not far from the Hall-yard:
But who enjoys my land and pleugh,
[This characteristic Fifish speech, My castle and my fine coal-heugh;5
which after all has a considerable glimmering of common sense, first appeared in Watson's Collection, Part I., 1706.]
I can find out no living man,
Can tell me this, do what I can.
Yet if my mem'ry serves me well,
This is the shire where I did dwell;
This is the part where I was born,
For so beneath me stands Kinghorn,
And there about the Lowmond hill
Stands as it stood yet ever still;
There is Burntisland, Aberdore,6
I see Fife's coast along the shore
Yet I am right, and for my life,
raving:0! but it's long and many a year,
This is my native county Fife :
WHAT accident, what strange mishap
Awakes me from my heavenly nap?
What spirit? what godhead by the lave 3
Hath raised my body from the grave?
It is a hundred years almost,
Since I was buried in the dust,
And now I think that I am living,
Or else, but doubt, my brains are
Yet do I feel-while as I study-
The faculties of all my body:
I taste, I smell, I touch, I hear,
I find my sight exceeding clear:
Then I'm alive, yea sure I am,
I know it by my corporal frame:
O! this is strange, that even in Fife,
I do know neither man nor wife;
No earl, no lord, no laird, no people,
But Leslie and the Mark-Inch steeple.
Old noble Weemys, and that is all,
I think enjoy their father's hall.
For from Dunfermling to Fifeness
I do know none that doth possess
His grandsire's castles and his towers;
All is away that once was ours.
I'm full of wrath, I scorn to tarrie,
I know them no more than the fairie :
But I admire1 and marvel strange
What is the cause of this great change:
I hear a murmuring report
Passing among the common sort;
For some say this, and some say that,
And others tell I know not what ;
Some say the Fife Lairds ever rues,
Since they began to take the Lews:2
That bargain first did brew their bale,
As tell the honest men of Crail.
Some too ascribe their supplantation,
Unto the lawyers congregation.
No, this is but a false suppose,
For all things wyte's 3 that well not goes.
Be what it will, there is some source
Hath bred this universal curse;
This transmigration and earthquake
That caused the Lairds of Fife to break.
He that enthrones a shepherdling,
He that dethrones a potent king,
And he that makes a cottar laird,
The Baron's bairns to delve a yaird, 4
Almighty He that shakes the mountains,
And brings great rivers from small foun-
tains,
It is the power of His hand,
That make both lords and lairds have land.
Yet there may be, as all men knaws,
An evident and well seen cause,
2 The island of Lewis,
of which a company of Fife pro
A public and a common evil,
That made the meikle Master-devil
To cast his club all Fife throughout,
And lent each Laird a deadly rout.1
Mark then, I'll tell you how it was,
What way this wonder came to pass :
It sets me best the truth to pen,
Because I fear no mortal men.
When I was born at Middle-yard weight
There was no word of Laird or Knight:
The greatest stiles of honour than 3
Was to be titled the Good-man.
But changing time hath changed the case,
And puts a Laird in the Good-man's place.
For why? my gossip Good-man John,
And honest James, whom I think on,
When we did meet whiles at the hawking
We used no cringes but hands shaking:
No bowing, should'ring gambo-scraping,
No French whistling or Dutch gaping;
We had no garments in our land
But what were spun by the Good-wife's
hand :
No drap-de-berry, clothes of seal;
No stuff ingrained in cocheneal
No plush, no tissue, cramosee ;
No China, Turkey, taffety;
No proud Pyropus, paragon,
Or chackarally, there was none :
No figurata or water-chamblet:
No bishop-satine, or silk-chamblet,
No cloth of gold, or beaver hats
We cared no more for than the cats:
No windy flourished flying feathers,
No sweet permusted shambo leathers,
No hilt or crampet richly hatched,
A lance, a sword in hand we snatched;
Such base and boyish vanities,
Did not beseem our dignities:
We were all ready and complete,
Stout for our friends, on horse or feet;
True to our prince to shed our blood,
For Kirk and for our common good :
prietors tried to take possession.
3 Is blamed. + Kitchen garden.
Such men we were, it is well known
As in our chronicles are shown.
This made us dwell into our land
And our posterity to stand:
But when the young laird became vain
And went away to France and Spain,
Rome raking, wandering here and there,
O! then became our bootless care:
Pride pufft him up because he was
Far travelled, and returned an ass.
Then must the Laird, the Good-man's oye1
Be knighted straight, and make convoy,
Coached through the streets with horses
four,
Foot-grooms pasmented 2 o'er and o'er,
Himself cut out and slasht so wide
Even his whole shirt his skin doth hide.
Gowperd, 3 gratni zied, 4 cloaks rare pointed,
Embroidered laced, with boots disjointed,
A belt embost with gold and purle
False hair made craftily to curle ;
Side breeks bebuttoned o'er the garters
Was ne'er the like seen in our quarters.
Tobacco and wine Frontinack,
Potato pasties, Spanish sack
Such uncouth food, such meat and drink,
Could never in our stomachs sink;
Rebats ribands, bands and ruffs,
Lapbends, shagbands, cuffs and muffs,
Folding outlays, pearling sprigs,
Atrys, vardigals, perewigs :
Hats, hoods, wires and also kells,
Washing-balls, perfuming smells:
French-gows cut out and double banded,
Jet rings to make her pleasant handed :
A fan, a feather, bracelets, gloves,
All new come-busks' she dearly loves :
For such trim bony baby-clouts
Still on the Laird she greets and shouts :
Which made the Laird take up more gear
Than all the lands or rigs could bear.
These are the emblems, that declares
The merchant's thriftless needless wares :
The tailor's curious vanitie,
My Lady's prodigalitie.
This is the truth that I discover;
I do not care for feid or favour;
For what I was, yet still I am,
An honest plain true dealing man ;
And if these words of mine would mend them
I care not by though I offend them.
Here is the cause most plainly shown, That have our country overthrown.
Then must the grandson swear and It's said of old, that other's harms
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